Jesus FAIL

They killed him yesterday and it was awful, as you might expect. Crucifixion, like a common criminal — but he wasn’t common, though now he’s a criminal. He broke their laws, which I guess are our laws.

No. He confirmed our Law. Justice: fulfill the Law. But the Romans didn’t want justice; they wanted quiet.

Now he’s dead, and it’s quiet.

Too quiet. Whispering trees makes you jump. Roman centurions can climb trees as well as tax collectors. Most of us are here, except the ones with families, except the women. I heard one say they’re going to the tomb tomorrow. How women talk!

Peter and Judas aren’t here, either. God knows where they’ve … so now I say it out loud, most of us aren’t here. And the rest are in a room, alone together.

James and John were here earlier, talking revolution — “Sons of Thunder” he called them. Hard to recall why.

OK, yes — James was talking the louder. John kept stopping mid-sentence, thinking, remembering. “But if … what about … ” he’d say, and then trail off, and then James would begin again.

I stopped listening but can’t stop wondering.

It’s a sort of vigil, I guess, not being able to sleep. Last night some of us couldn’t stay awake; now we find our bodies forcing us to.

And they were some of the top guys, too, I don’t mind saying, now that it’s over. I don’t just mean the 12 … 11 … even the leaders couldn’t hack it last night. Take that as you may.

OK, Thomas is asleep. That guy could sleep through an earthquake.

*

If they come for us, we’ll run.

Did I say that? Did I think it?

Walking to Jerusalem … Adonai, not two weeks ago … we said and thought differently. And it was different when Jesus was alive.

I said was.

Don’t know how he can be dead — we certainly never thought of that.

Of course we know how — three nine-inch nails rammed into bone, and a ten-foot spear jammed into his side

“Son of God,” he said. They all said it. We all said it.

What did that man say? Help my unbelief.

Did he mock him then as we want to now?

*

Augh! We saw it. We saw him healing, feeding, teaching … and Lazarus. We saw Lazarus.

Thomas would know — I mean he’d remember. He’d want answers, like Judas always wanted receipts, but you know, once he gets something in his hands, he’s solid. Right now he just sleeps.

Me? I don’t have many questions, I don’t think. I only wish Jesus were here to say it all again. He wouldn’t even have to say it, because he’d be here, and it would be enough that he was here.

*

My father would say when you die, you’ll have fewer questions than you thought, but the ones you do have are really, really big. It was true when he died, and now that we might die, I’m trying to focus on just a few. But the problem is, when someone else dies, the questions come rushing in.

But if he weren’t dead, I think we wouldn’t have them again, or we wouldn’t care. We’d just sit, listen — no crowds, even, and no tumult. None of that “loaves and fishes” business.

That’s what we started calling the craziness, when the rabbi would heal someone, or send his questioners, again with the questions!, away, more confused than when they came. And there would be a problem, and we’d have to move on, leave in the darkest night, or cross that lake in thunders and hail. We started calling those times “loaves and fishes” moments. And everyone knew what you meant.

Turning over the tables and thrashing the moneylenders — that was another one. Coins zipping!! into the air and they didn’t know whether to grab at them, or try to cover up their heads and hides from his blows hammering down on them.

Loaves and fishes.

*

Of course, now I’m hungry. All this talk of food. I know it’s odd. Time like this.

*

We’d do it all again, mind you. He was the Christ. What else was there? Who?

*

We’d trudge up and down Israel again, if only he were here. And happy to. Just as thrilled to do nothing, of course, and we could skip all those side trips to Samaria, if it’s all the same to you.

Gehenna! How he loved going to Samaria.

Best not to think too much about it. My dad again: don’t make promises when you’re hungry — none you wouldn’t make when you’re full. You say things, he said. You say things, you’d never say at midday meal. You make promises you know you won’t keep, and that you’re pretty sure you won’t be asked to.

And yet, there it is. What would we do?

There are parts we each remember, so when you lay them out in a line, it nearly makes sense. But it’s so late, and it’s so dark.

“Yes, Lord,” we said. We said that a lot.

I think we might say it again.

But mustn’t promise.

*

Peter made promises, and we all had to agree because he was in one of his moods. And it wasn’t midday, but the sun had only just set, and we were full, and my father was right about the pledges: it was so easy.

And Jesus, again, didn’t seem to be listening.

“When you have turned,” he said to Peter.

Like he knew.

*

Pointless to go on and on about it. Yes, yes — if Jesus were here … but he’s not, and we are.

We’re awake because there’s nothing better to do and it feels safest. And, anyway, we aren’t all awake. The women said they were going tomorrow but tomorrow maybe they will say something else. I might go later, when it’s light out. I don’t know.

I hope.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recent

And Did Dostoevsky Say ‘Beauty Will Save’

Short answer: he did not. Neither did Prince Myshkin, that we know of. Likely both believed it. Beauty — in the person of Christ — will do so. And clearly D wrote of M in The Idiot to explore art and beauty and ugliness and salvation. But did he say it, and did he believe that

Read More »

What I Recalled Watching Netflix

[Television is educational.]   One Saying the same stuff over and over looks like you have different things to say. Two If you’re ever in a below-average film or streaming series, and you beat the tar out of a guy, in a house, and you gaze down in both some shock as also a certain

Read More »

Seeking the King

A line everywhere misattributed to Chesterton reads thus: The young man who rings the bell at the brothel is unconsciously looking for God. This line is not from the great [several senses of the word] man who recently celebrated his 150th birthday, but the mid-century most unmodern novelist Bruce Marshall. The words — which do

Read More »

He’s the Guy

Those social media posts of ‘this moment in this famous film was totally unscripted!!!’ as if that by itself makes it better miss the point. Moat unscripted material, like most ideas, inventions, ideas, notions, &c … fails — such is the nature of creativity: the best stuff, it is devoutly to be wished, sticks around;

Read More »

Random

Metered Sins

Poetry’s a sneaky bastard. All the time sidling up to one on false pretenses — ‘It’s just the one’ … ‘We won’t intrude’ — and they’re all lies damn one’s eyes! Lies-damned-lies and no need for statistics and the pile of warm laundry does not diminish and soon loses its warmth and begins to glower

Read More »

Murder, Inc.

In Season One’s “Ransom for a Dead Man” Columbo tells a story about his cousin Ralph. He’s flying in Leslie Williams’ plane and she’s been talking about her husband, whom she’s murdered. By the story he tells after they’ve landed, he enters the murderer’s mind — with a significant stopping point: “I have this cousin, Ralph,

Read More »

Forget What?

Today is the 11th anniversary of the September 11, 2001 attacks. Poking around, I found this short item, from the Fictional Newswire New York (FN) — Eleven years after the World Trade Center attacks here in September 2001, most haven’t forgotten … they just don’t know why they were supposed to remember. “Uh, I’m pretty

Read More »

I Wish I Had Written This Post

If you could do it, I suppose, it would be a good idea to live your life in a straight line — starting, say, in the Dark Wood of Error, and proceeding by logical steps through Hell and Purgatory and into Heaven. Or you could take the King’s Highway past the appropriately named dangers, toils,

Read More »

Related

You’re Doing It Wrong

A friend once recounted how a mutual acquaintance of ours had told her God spoke to him, which he meant both literally and verbally. It’s enough on one point to note the gent didn’t say God spoke with him — which wd seem to be preferred, all things taken together — but that isn’t what I’ll

Read More »

The End In Mind

Sometimes we imagine ourselves the star of our own personal blockbuster biopic, currently in production (it’s sometimes in development hell, but generally moving forward) and it’s all vital and crucial, Academy Award-material, two thumbs way up. God is teaching us all this stuff, we think, even if don’t presently know what it is. And if

Read More »

Trouble and Strife

Septic tank is Cockney rhyming slang for “Yank” which may suggest what trouble and strife is slang for. But it’s not fair of course, and good men, and most men some of the time, know she’s not only that. Upon noting once how, yes, “children are a bother,” Dallas Willard made the important philosophical distinction

Read More »

Just Win Baby

If Tim Tebow never plays another down as an NFL Quarterback it won’t be because he can’t. It will be because they say he can’t. I don’t even say “because they think he can’t,” since thinking — actually assessing the data they have in front of them — hasn’t been much involved here. And the bottom line

Read More »